Korean funerals are symbolic ceremonies that honor family and ancestors with respect. Attending one can feel overwhelming if you are unfamiliar with the customs, but every ritual carries meaning.

While traditional funerals follow practices shaped by centuries of culture and religion, many Korean-American families adapt these traditions for modern life. This guide explains the key customs, etiquette, and how cremation and memorial services fit into Korean funerals today.

If you have questions about planning a cremation, or you want guidance on what it involves, After’s team is available 24/7 to answer questions and guide families through each step.

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What Is a Korean Funeral?

A Korean funeral is a memorial ritual containing common religious practices from the traditions of Korea. It honors the deceased, comforts the family, and ensures a respectful passage into the afterlife.

Confucian values emphasize duty to parents and elders, while Buddhist beliefs focus on impermanence and rebirth. Christian families often include hymns, blessings, or prayers. These influences shape the ceremony into a spiritual and communal event.

The funeral unites family and friends in collective mourning. People share meals, bow in respect, and pray together as part of the grieving process.

In Korea, funerals usually last several days and remain family-centered. In the United States, Korean-American families often hold shorter services in funeral homes or churches, sometimes with livestreams to include distant relatives.

Key Stages of a Korean Funeral

Care After Death

Korean funeral traditions begin with preparing the deceased with respect and dignity. Family members might bathe the person, trim nails, and comb hair as part of the ritual of purification. They then dress the individual in suui (su-ui, 수의), a traditional burial garment symbolizing humility.

In traditional preparation, families may place coins over the eyes, cotton or gauze plugs in the ears and nose, and three spoonfuls of rice in the mouth before shrouding.

Korean Death Rituals: Preparation and Mourning Roles

The preparation stage highlights the importance of family roles. The eldest son, known as the sangju or chief mourner, typically takes responsibility for overseeing the funeral.

He organizes arrangements, leads prayers, and greets visitors. The deceased may rest at home or in a hospital mortuary hall, where family members keep vigil.

This vigil includes welcoming guests, offering them food or tea, and maintaining an atmosphere of reverence. Family presence during this time establishes the value they place on collective mourning.

The Three-Day Funeral

Korean funerals traditionally last for three days, with each day holding a specific meaning:

• Day 1 focuses on the setup of the wake and the beginning of mourning. Wailing, called kok, is an expression of grief that often marks this stage.
• Day 2 centers on visitation and prayer. Friends, colleagues, and extended relatives attend, bringing condolence envelopes and bowing in respect.
• Day 3 concludes with burial or cremation, depending on family preference, followed by a communal meal of remembrance. Sharing food after the service symbolizes community support and allows mourners to honor the life of the deceased.

This three-day period ensures that families can express grief openly and that rituals for spiritual transition are complete.

Mourning Gestures

Attendees follow several gestures to show respect during a Korean funeral. Guests bow twice to the portrait or altar.

Burning incense is another meaningful act, as it symbolizes purification and the sending of good wishes to the deceased. The common Korean condolences etiquette may involve guests bringing envelopes with money, which support the family and express solidarity

They encourage quiet prayer, as it provides a personal way to honor the deceased without disrupting the solemnity of the occasion.

Adaptations in Korean-American Families

Korean-American families often adjust these traditions to fit modern life. Many services are shortened to one or two days, reflecting busy schedules and the use of funeral homes or chapels instead of family homes.

Church services may replace traditional chanting, and livestreams allow distant relatives to participate from abroad. Despite these changes, the core customs remain.

Families still bow, burn incense, and give condolence envelopes, preserving the spirit of respect and remembrance while balancing practicality.

Korean Memorial Services and Ancestor Rituals

Korean families hold memorial services to honor ancestors and maintain a spiritual connection with them. These services remind younger generations of their heritage and show ongoing respect for those who passed away.

Jesa: Ancestral Memorial Service

Jesa is the ancestral memorial service held on the anniversary of a family member’s death. Families gather at home, in a temple, or sometimes at a gravesite. They set up a table with offerings of rice, fruits, fish, meat, and traditional dishes.

Ancestral tablets or photographs are placed on the altar, and family members bow, light incense, and say prayers.

Food Offerings And Prayers

The food is not only symbolic but also represents gratitude to ancestors. Meals may include favorites of the deceased as a sign of remembrance. Family members pray together, bow in turn, and share the meal afterward, reinforcing community and memory.

Adaptations In Korean-American Families

Korean-American families often simplify Jesa because of space, schedules, or cultural blending. Some families hold smaller gatherings with symbolic food offerings. Others combine the ritual with church services or host online memorials.

While the scale is smaller, the core idea of respect and remembrance remains central.

Korean Funeral Attire and Etiquette

Funeral attire and etiquette in Korea focus on showing respect through simplicity and restraint. Guests who attend are expected to dress modestly and follow quiet, respectful customs.

What To Wear

Guests typically wear black or dark clothing. Men often choose a black suit with a white shirt, while women wear black dresses or skirts with conservative tops.

Immediate family members may wear sangbok (상복), traditional mourning attire often made of sambe (삼베, hemp cloth). You should always avoid bright colors or casual attire at funerals.

Proper Behavior During Visitation

Attendees should act with calmness and respect. Speak in soft tones, avoid laughter or loud conversation, and follow the lead of the family or funeral staff. Do not take photographs or use your phone in the visitation area.

Condolence Etiquette

When offering condolences, short and respectful phrases are best. Common expressions include “I offer my condolences” or, in Korean, “조의를 표합니다.” Avoid asking about the details of the death or giving long personal speeches.

Bowing and Prayer

Bowing is the most common gesture of respect. Guests usually bow when greeting the family and again when facing the deceased. Some services may include prayer or incense burning, but participation is optional. Guests can observe others and follow their example.

Korean Funeral Flowers and Offerings

Flowers and offerings play an important role in Korean funerals, symbolizing respect and collective support for the grieving family.

Flowers

White and yellow chrysanthemums are the most common flowers at Korean funerals. They symbolize purity, grief, and sincerity. Floral wreaths and stands are often placed near the altar or casket as a visual sign of mourning.

Condolence Wreaths

Groups of friends, coworkers, or extended family may send large flower stands as a way to honor the deceased. These are often displayed with ribbons that include short condolence messages or the names of those who contributed.

Monetary Gifts

Guests usually bring condolence envelopes filled with money, known as buigeum. This tradition supports the family with funeral expenses and expresses solidarity. 

They place the money in a plain white envelope, often with a simple condolence phrase written on the outside. The amount varies depending on the closeness of the relationship, but the sincerity of the gesture is what matters most.

Where Is the Body During a Korean Funeral?

In a traditional Korean funeral, the body remains either at the family home or in a hospital mortuary hall for the duration of the funeral period. This setting allows family and friends to gather, offer prayers, and take part in rituals of respect.

Visitation usually happens at the wake site, where guests can bow, present condolence envelopes, or light incense. Food and tea are often served to create a supportive environment for mourners. Family members typically keep vigil nearby, welcoming visitors and maintaining the atmosphere of reverence.

Cremation and Burial Customs in Korean Culture

Burial was historically the preferred practice in Korea, reflecting the cultural importance of ancestral graves and the land that families maintained for generations. Traditional burials often included processions and symbolic gestures, such as placing soil on the grave.

In modern times, cremation has become more acceptable. Rising land costs, urban living, and practical concerns have made it the most common choice in South Korea and among Korean-American families. Many communities and churches now view it as a dignified and respectful practice.

Families continue to honor the deceased after cremation through visits to columbaria, where they place urns in dedicated memorial spaces. Korean cemetery cremation and memorial services, such as jesa, also continue, ensuring that the act of remembrance remains central.

During these rituals, families gather to make offerings, share prayers, and uphold traditions of ancestor respect.

Modern Adaptations: Korean Funerals in the U.S.

Korean funerals in the United States often look different from those held in Korea, but they retain their spirit of respect and remembrance. Funeral homes and chapels are now the most common locations for services, providing spaces where families can blend traditional customs with American practices.

Korean-American families balance tradition with practicality. 

Some families maintain incense offerings, bowing, and condolence envelopes, while also incorporating church-led ceremonies, livestreams, or shorter services. These adjustments help relatives who live far away participate while still preserving meaningful rituals.

For many families, the focus remains on how they continue to honor and remember their relatives, whether through columbaria visits, church memorials, or annual ancestor rites.

Korean funeral homes in the U.S. often provide bilingual staff, allowing families to carry out traditional practices in a way that feels accessible and supportive. This blending of customs shows how cultural continuity can adapt to modern needs without losing its foundation of respect.

After Provides Thoughtful Support for Every Family

We understand that every family deserves dignity, clarity, and compassion during one of life’s hardest moments. While we don’t arrange Korean funeral or memorial services, we do provide direct cremation packages designed to make the process simple, transparent, and affordable.

Families can choose from different plans that include essential services such as transportation, permits, dedicated care specialists, and secure delivery of remains. After also partners with LilyPay to provide flexible payment plans, including crowdfunding support for families who need financial assistance.

If you need immediate services, you can call 1-844-717-5170 at any time. After’s team is available 24/7 to answer questions and guide families through each step.

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Frequently Asked Questions

How Long Does a Korean Funeral Last?

A Korean funeral usually lasts three days. In the United States, Korean-American families may shorten the service to one or two days for practicality.

What Should I Wear to a Korean Funeral?

You should wear black or dark clothing to a Korean funeral. Avoid bright colors, and note that immediate family members may wear traditional white hemp or linen mourning clothes.

What Flowers Are Appropriate for a Korean Funeral?

The most appropriate flowers for a Korean funeral are white or yellow chrysanthemums. These symbolize purity, respect, and sincere mourning.

What Do You Say When Offering Condolences in Korean?

The most common phrases to say at a Korean funeral are “조의를 표합니다” (I offer my condolences) or “삼가 고인의 명복을 빕니다” (May the deceased rest in peace).

Is Cremation Common in Korean Funerals?

Yes, cremation is now very common in Korean funerals. Over 90 percent of services in South Korea and most Korean-American funerals include cremation.